Penn State

IDK why but this dude seems smart. Like if he didn't play football he'd go to like a top public school for CS and be like the president of the anime club or some shit. I feel like he can turn Jameis Winston into a true philosopher.

Toledo

Terrion Arnold sounds like a really colty name, but I swear to fuck the colts turn these prospects from the most random ass schools into solid ballers. Like I wouldn't be surprised if they pick a tight end from Peking University who'll play in the league for a decade

Washington

I don't really think the seahawks will pick him, but the aesthetic of them picking a UW player is just too solid for me to ignore

Alabama

This dude just gives off AFC South, IDK what it is, but this dude has to play for a team that the majority of fans own a MAGA hat. It just works.

Texas

Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys Please dont fuck this up guys











They're gonna fuck this up aren't they. On the off chance they don't they'll take one of Newton, Murphy, Turner, Fuaga or Mims at this junction, and I won't mind

Alabama

I think the rams wanna trade up which I get, but im not predicting any trades because I think that'd give me headache lowkey. I think Turner is BPA and the rams D-Line is hot ass now that Aaron Donald is out

LSU

Fuck The Steelers, I hope he sucks

Florida State

The Dolphins seem like a very Zesty franchise, and I think Jared Verse is a Very Zesty name. Also the Dolphins prolly need some pass rush

Alabama

Koolest Name in the draft man. Howie Roseman's gonna work some draft day magic and trade down and still get this kid, but I digress. Congrats on the Division Playoff Loss Mr. McKinstry

Illinois

Bro with a name like Jer'Zhan there's no way bro doesn't succeed in the NFL c'mon now. This dude just has It bro.

Oregon State

I just look at pictures of this dude and it's so easy for me to see him in a Cowboys uniform. So yeah, Cowboy Up or whatever the fuck they say in Dallas

Iowa

The Packers just seem like a team that'll take a white Cornerback. I don't make the rules, I just follow them.

Duke

I don't really have anything funny to say for this one. Sorry y'all :(

Georgia

AMARIUS! PROTECT OUR SHORT KING AND MY HEIGHT SHALL BE YOURS

Penn State

Blah Blah Blah, Bills need a DE or something, Chop works. Speaking of the Bills, Josh Allen is an overrated motherfucker. The dude runs and fake slides his way into getting good yards, and suddenly his interceptions and fumbles just disappear. God he pisses me off.

Oregon

I really wanted Frank Ragnow to be a Bengal. We would've taken care of you, like you would've Joe Burrow. Instead we got Silly Billy Price. But now Franks Foot is Fucked Forever so they pick JPJ

Clemson

Nate Wiggins is a corny ass disney channel name, and goes to the corniest team in the NFL. Fuck the Ravens.

Oklahoma

I don't like the Niners. So don't be surprised when this guy gets his gold jacket

BYU

Mormons love supporting mormons, Andy Reid is a mormon. Kingsley went to BYU.